just the wind

Arthouse theatre
thunder in the background
rain pounding at the door
some ungodly hour
and you could swear
you heard a knock at the door
you don't know how
but you know
this is not
the opportunity
you were waiting for
again
but louder
there's no denying it now
but you continue
to pretend
it's just the wind
and nothing more

You'll never soar

if you don't let go
of what's holding you down

Strange things

It leaves a weird feeling and uncertainties when one is told to be careful about what one says to who in regards to people that one thought one was able to speak more or less freely with.

Dear friend,

You fascinated me. You still do.

You have inspired me in so many ways. Lots of which you probably don't even know.

You helped shape the person I was, am, and will become. I don't think you know what you've meant to me since when we were together I don't think I knew, and I definitely did not have the words. And now that we're apart, I've lost the chance to share the words that I have found.

Maybe this letter will find you and if it does I hope it finds you well. I am who I am because of you. Sometimes I wonder who I would be if you had not been there when you were but I'm always glad that I am me and you were there. I like who I am even if sometimes I spend too much time in my head, in the past, and wondering what might have been. I am here, in the now and looking forward to what comes next.

Thank you friend, for being you and allowing me to be me. I send my love to you wherever you may be and wonder if you ever think of me...

~Forbsie

Love letters to the past

Writing love letters to the past. To you, to him, to her, even to me. It may seem like a futile task but really it’s a labour of love. A way of recognizing, accepting, and maybe even appreciating, what was and what could never be. A way of saying thank you, and giving a nod to what has made me who I am. No one needs to read them but they are available if you want to. I just put pen to paper and let the words flow, remembering, reliving, just being. Feeling the love and leaving it there to share with someone, no one, everyone. It is what it is. Take it or leave it. If it works for you, great! If not, I wish you luck in finding something that does.

This is me now signing off. Sending my love. xo

Something to think about

90 people get the swine flu and everyone wants to wear a mask.
A million people have AIDS and no one wants to wear a condom.

(Found using stumbleupon http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2EgOT3/i143.photobucket.com/albums/r140/rwruppel/Swineflu.jpg)

"Cherish your solitude. Take trains by yourself to places you have never been. Sleep alone under the stars. Learn how to drive a stick shift. Go so far away that you stop being afraid of not coming back. Say no whenever you don't want to do something. Say yes if your instincts are strong, even if everyone around you disagrees. Decide whether you want to be liked or admired. Decide if fitting in is more important than finding out what you're doing here. Believe in kissing."

- Eve Ensler (author of The Vagina Monologues)

Faith

Faith is often blind, a given because it's what you have been told your entire life, but what happens when you question it? When you can no longer believe blindly, just because someone is telling you to? The idea of faith fascinates me, particularly when it comes to religion. The religious faith that some people possess is almost unbelievable. The way that people can take what they are being told and incorporate it without question is something I don't understand. What is also interesting to me, is how the level of security one has with their faith impacts how they handle questions and conversations involving religion and beliefs. From what I have observed, one who is secure in his/her faith is less argumentative and more willing to just generally discuss. They will agree to disagree as needed. On the other hand, one who is less secure and therefore likely has more of his/her own questions that need answers, is more argumentative and more apt to aim at convincing someone else that his/her beliefs are correct. I’ve noticed that the ones that are not entirely sure and potentially even questioning their own beliefs are also more likely to be defensive if you bring up something contradictory to their beliefs. Where someone who’s faith is solid won’t argue with you as they won’t be swayed from what they believe regardless of what you put in front of them.

Just a little something to think about.

Time flies

So, I can't believe it's already April.....that's crazy. Time goes way too fast. So much has changed in the past few weeks and yet everything seems so much the same. I got my hands on a number of things from my childhood as my parents are downsizing. Some of the photos are pretty funny. Maybe I'll post a couple when I have a chance, we'll see. Interesting to see how things have changed when you look back at where you've been in contrast to where you are. Something else to consider is the fact that a photo is a physical reminder of a specific moment in time. Things are not the same and you are no longer the person in that photo. This comes to mind from a comment a friend of mine made in this regard. Anyway, just got to go with it or life will leave you behind.

That's my random ramblings for this morning....I need sleep.....