I am enough

On the days I rise like the sun

ready to take on the world

I am enough

on the days I hide in the shadows

like the dark side of the moon

I am enough

On the days I can stand in courage

and it's easy to step into the flow

I am enough

On the days anxiety takes over

telling me I'll mess it all up

I am enough

On the days filled with laughter

joy and positivity

I am enough

On the days it's a challenge 

just to get out of bed

I am enough

On the days I can be fully me

all imperfections okay

I am enough

On the days I can barely 

look myself in the eye

I am enough

The easy days

the hard days

the everything days

the nothing days

and all that comes amongst these

I am enough

Whatever society says

whatever my mind tells me

whatever is happening

inside and out

I am enough

Just as I am

in this moment

right here, right now

I am always enough

Coming back around

 Coming back around

to the things I used to love

the things I used to know inside and out

coming back around

seeking

 searching

coming with wonder and awe

wandering

wondering

what the hell happened

where did I lose the things

where did I lose myself

coming back around

again and again

revisiting

relearning

unlearning

renewing

finding myself

under all the layers of bs

all the layers of "supposed to be"

all the layers of others expectations

all the layers of protection

coming home

reaching out 

from myself to myself

coming back around

remembering

refreshing

renewing

coming back around

and finding myself waiting 

with love and open arms

with understanding and compassion

with complete and unconditional acceptance

"I've been waiting for you"

Time to play!

 Floating

Drifting

Feeling the air

Occupying space

With a breath I come down

Settle

Feel the earth beneath me

Grounding

Supporting

Turning in

Sensing

Connecting

With the fire in my belly

It keeps me fueled to function

With the water throughout my body

That allows me to flow

To maneuver

To transform

I am stardust

Conspiring with the elements

With the universe

With the universal

To be me for a while

(as you are to be you)

I am magic

(as are you)

Time to play!

Just being me

 Drifting through the vastness of my internal world

Floating like a leaf on the breeze

Watching thoughts come and go

Doing my best not to get caught in the tidal wave

The whirlwind

Not to fall into the rabbit hole

To stay in the place of observation

To stay curious

To feel all there is to feel

To be present and connected

To be fully immersed in the experience

Returning to the breath

Returning to the body

Here and now

Inhale

Exhale

Feel the earth below me

Connecting with the sky above me

Fully occupying this space

This moment

This life

Letting go of the past

And what may come

Grounded

Present

Tuned in

Aware

Just being

Me

 They looked at him questioningly

Not exactly what he was hoping for

but at least they were looking

Now what?

Gotta do something

with this attention

They watch

waiting

anticipating what's to come

Mind blanks

The plan's gone out the window

time to wing it

Nothing's happened

Attention is shifting

and they're no longer looking

Didn't take the chance

Missed the opportunity

Fading into the background again

Just be

Inhale.

Exhale. 

I feel so small.

It was just a dream.

My mind knows that but my body doesn't. It feels like it happened.

Inhale.

Exhale.

Feel it all.

Let go of resistance.

Sit with everything.

Welcome all parts to the table.

No judgement, just love,

and an openness to receive.

Let it be.

Remember. 

You are a being.

So just be.

Perfection

An illusion created

to keep us small

Stay in line

Be what we tell you to be

Be a lady

Be a man

Good girls don't

Boy's don't

Buy this product

Exist this way

I'm over it

Not here to be a half

Not here to fit in

and disappear

Not here to confort and break

just to fit this assigned box

Time to step out

Time to break it down

Time to create something new

Let's create a quilt

Bringing all our uniqueness

Authentic connection

with reverence and love

for all the things that make us us

There is no perfect

We are not meant to be

a supporting role in this story

We're meant to be the lead

and the author of our own

Stories of all kinds

coexisting

like books in a second hand store

Side by side

Each their own

Culminating

in an inspiring collection

of adventure and life

Are you ready?

Take my hand

We'll drop this illusion

and together

we'll build something magical.

Before

 

I sit in the quiet

before the sun rises

before the city gets going

I appreciate the moment

finding presence with my breath

Inhale

Exhale

Inahle

Exhale

No expectations

in this moment

No requirements

No tasks

Just me

and the quiet peace

of this morning

before the sun rises

before the city gets going

holding shame to release her

i entered my internal world
found an angry resistant teen by my side
and a sense of heaviness
she didn't want to go anywhere near
and did her best to convince me not to
i stepped into curiosity
and took her along with me to explore
i moved into the heaviness
i took a breath
and asked "what is this"
then waited
soon i received an answer
shame
clearly stated
the teen wanted out
i told her it's ok and moved forward
i told shame it's ok
she's welcome here
i accept her
i forgive her
i forgive her
i forgive her
repeated until she believed it
she became smaller
i thanked her
expressing gratitude for all my past
for all that brought me to where i am now
she faded away
then i turned to the teen
i turned towards resistance and anger
i turned towards the fear that was intertwined there
i wrapped her in my arms
and told her it's ok
i thanked her for keeping me safe
i welcomed her into the whole
i told her she can rest now
i've got this
and she relaxed into the embrace
becoming one with me

moving into the shadow

this morning i sat with darkness
i held space for her
i stayed present
she screamed
she cried
she pounded the walls and the floor
i don't know why
i'm learning i don't need to know
i filled the space with compassion
with acceptance
with love
i did my best to help her feel safe
to allow her to just be
and for me to just be
present together
no longer alone
deep breath
hands from the universe
layers peeled away
crumpled
and tossed
confusing
but fascinating to watch
release
sigh to exhale
that's enough for today
time to rest
i stroke her hair
and bathe her in love and gratitude
full acceptance
a step closer
moving into the shadow

internal storm

it's hard to sit with myself right now
my body feels like it doesn't fit right
something inside me is crying
i can't find it
i don't know how to offer comfort
or to hold it
it seems like my skin is trying to run away
my bones want to collapse
and the muscles just fade away
water flows in and through
fire burns endlessly
air moves in and out
earth holds things together
while space tries to break it apart
part of me is screaming
let me out
i need to get away
but there's no where to go
there's just here
just now
this moment
i take a breath
welcoming in the chaos
bracing myself for the storm
knowing
i'll be stronger
when it's over
but not knowing
when that will be
or where it will take me
in the mean time
hold on tight
(to what?)
going for a ride
in a hurricane
of feelings and emotions
sensations without context
mixed up
and all blended together
searching for the eye
finding a calmness
in the middle of it all
i'll stay here for now
wait it out
and see what's left...

i asked my body what its trying to tell me and this was the result

fear came to visit this morning
...well that's putting it nicely...

she is a child who came barreling at me in full force and slammed against me. i could feel her as a knot in my stomach. tightness in my chest. a lump in the base of my throat that seems to get bigger when i try to swallow it down. i met her with open arms and collective tears. embraced her. held her. repeatedly told her that she is welcome here. she is safe here. i will hold her for as long as she needs. i embraced all the sensations that she brought. i did my best to drop my walls and be fully present. to just be. letting go of control (not an easy task). moving into feeling. letting my logic brain run as it does without letting it run away with me. holding her. holding me. just be.

breathe...

the alchemy

the alchemy of you
sounds of a language i don't speak
words without meaning
yet i understand them all
the vibrations tune in to an inner part of me
the stardust magic we're all made of
the light
the dark
the spaces between
                                (distance is an illusion)
time and space
just a memory
a moment
lost but not forgotten
still happening somewhere on another plane
in another lifetime
dancing
drifting in the flow
embracing all that is
accepting
changing
                               - moving with purpose -
connecting
reaching out
touching
the alchemy of me

it's all so simple

As night became day
he started to understand the truth
doors opened in his mind
the world grew before his eyes
his breath caught
as the awe set in
awareness
amazement
understanding
acceptance
an inner knowing
becomes conscious
the seed planted long ago
beings to sprout and take shape
a new beginning
a different ending
a magic envelopes everything
his mind is open wide
he begins to laugh
pure joy radiates out
it's all so simple
how did it take so long to see?



(inspired by this prompt: As night becomes day, he started to understand the truth.)

Prompt: The Letter

The Letter

a single page
neatly written
full of concern
full of care
wondering
questioning
reaching out
to connect
across the distance
across the time
sent anonymously
as a surprise
with the hope
of making someone
smile
making a moment
shine a little brighter
creating a chance
to feel a little lighter
to breathe easier
even if only
momentarily

Memento Inktober 31: Samhain

sunset marks the beginning and the end
celebrating harvest
preparing for darker days
midway between
equinox and solstice
magic in the air
people guising
enjoying bonfires
feasting
divination
connection with nature
connection with spirits
open to the change of seasons

Memento Inktober 30: Black Death

epic epidemic
death of the masses
suffering
pain
confusion
no one knowing
what to do
how to stop it
how to avoid it
as it moves
across countries
taking no prisoners
leaving bodies behind
broken families
lost souls
suffering
pain
confusion
black death
takes its toll

Memento Inktober 29: Miserere

seeker of mercy
playing songs made just for you
hoping that you hear

Memento Inktober 28: Evocation

bring spirits forth
bring energy
bring desire
bring the universe

become spirit
become energy
become desire
become the universe

believe you have control
believe you know
believe this is real
believe in the universe

know you have no control
know what you do not know
know this is true
know the universe

Memento Inktober 27: Angel of Death

present at the end
collecting your lasting soul
travelling beyond